monday

Finding Motivation Again|Mental Health Monday #6

KelliLeave a comment

2020 has definitely been a weird and long year. The events of the world has changed our lives forever.

I went into 2020 being confident that this year was going to be MY year. My year actually started out with an unusual amount of panic attacks. Honestly, I understood why I was because I was undergoing a lot of stress with my personal life and the fact that I was graduating in a few months with no idea what I wanted to do with my life.

After I graduated, my mental health went further downhill. The only things I did with my days is go to work, go to the gym, and watch Netflix – not necessarily in that order. You would have thought that going to the gym would have improved my mood, but the gym high did not last. I had been coming home and watching Netflix for hours until I went to bed.

Even though I was struggling for six months of the year,  I finally came out of my slump a week ago. Depression is weird. I can go into a depressive episode for no reason, and I can also suddenly come out of one. I told myself that I needed to be more productive, and I finally did something about it.

I’ve started doing a checklist again. I feel so accomplished when I mark something off of my checklist. This past week I have been trying to get at least half of my checklist done before I turn on Netflix. This will typically put my at starting Netflix sometime after five o’clock. Below is an example of what my typical list consists of.IMG_2455.PNG

I’m hoping this motivation stays for at least a little bit. I’m going a week strong.

Wish me luck.

Mental Health Monday #5

KelliLeave a comment

The main thing I struggle with is motivation. My mind is really good at convincing me to not do something even though I know I would regret not doing it later. This happens frequently with schoolwork, getting up early, going out, working out, and meditating. I know these things will make me feel better in the long run, but I still find it hard to get myself to do it.

I did have a good week of self-care. I was pretty consistent with my morning/night routine, being productive, meditating, and even exercising.

This week is my spring break, and I am excited to enjoy my time out of school. I won’t be lazy though! I am mostly going to be working this week so I’ll have a little extra money next paycheck. I do have a ‘Spring Break 2020 Bucket List’ that I will be posting about soon. I am still going to be productive even though I am on a break.

I know that sometimes doing nothing is a form of self-care too. The only thing is that when I do nothing, even for a day, it starts to take a negative toll on my mental health. I need fresh air and positive people at least once in a 12 hour period.

These next couple of months are going to be rough. I am graduating in exactly two months. I am so scared. I am not going to get everything done. I also don’t know what I am going to do after graduation, but I am not as worried about that.

I just hope I stay sane.

I’ll update you on my sanity next Monday.

Mental Health Monday #1

KelliLeave a comment

On Instagram, I follow the hashtag “#Mentalhealthmatters” because I love reading motivational quotes and people’s stories. I was scrolling through my Instagram earlier when I see a guy that had ‘Mental Health Monday #2’ as the start of his caption. (His insta is nickfituk). This post struck me differently than the others. Every Monday he is going to post a blog about mental health, and that is what I decided I wanted to do too. (You should join in on Mental Health Monday also!)

Mental health is a part of everyone. Sometimes it can be good mental health, but then sometimes it can be bad. I’ve dealt with a lot of bad mental health in my life. I don’t always know why it is there. It just shows up in the middle of nowhere. Luckily, I think I am slowly getting out of an episode. I have been more productive and slightly happier these last few weeks. I think I mostly needed a break from school. I was severely isolating myself.

For 2020, my main goal is to take care of myself better. Sometimes I get so frustrated with  myself because I know things that would make me feel better, but I talk myself out of doing them anyway.

Two of the main things that improves my mood is exercise and meditation. Exercising has been a bit more difficult here lately because every time I run, I feel like passing out. I’ve been dealing with a sinus problem since November (and yes, I’ve been to the doctor). There are other workouts that I can still do, I am just still trying to force myself into a routine. I want to start getting up early and working out/meditating.

I am hoping writing this post motivates me to do better. I will update you on if it did or not next Monday!