Weekend Wrap-Up #5

This week seemed to go on forever. By the weekend I wasn’t even sure what day it was. I also forgot to write most things down as I went a long so I am having to search my memory.

  • I finally went to the doctor about my allergies being so bad. They gave me a couple nasal sprays and antibiotics for my ears that are infected. As of Sunday, this is day 5 of antibiotics. They’re still irritating at the start of day 5, but hopefully after this they will be a lot better.
  • I love that my friends keep telling me that I can move in with them, but I cannot leave my grandpa. I hope they understand. They say I would regret staying in this small town, but I know I would regret leaving him. When he’s gone, I’ll go too.
  • Meeting with an old friend was nice. I can’t believe it had been a whole year since I had seen her. We’d been best friend for 7 years. We’ve both changed a lot in those 7 years.
  • Every year we have about two groups of bikers that come through during the summer. It’s really cool and they’re always nice. This week a group from Germany came through and ate.
  • I have come to accept the fact that I am useless on Sundays in the way of getting out of the house after I’ve worked. Sundays at work just really wear me out, and I do not want to go hang out with anyone after.

My Favorite Christmas Tradition

Today I have been feeling really sentimental. I was going through some pictures when I found some from when I was about seven or eight at my birthday party. One picture that really brought tears to my eyes were one that had my Nana and I in it… She died almost 12 years ago, but I still miss her just as much as I did back then.

When I was trying to figure out what I wanted to write for Blogmas day 4, I saw this prompt and immediately thoughts about my nana and my Pa (whom is still alive).

My favorite Christmas tradition is Christmas at their house on Christmas Eve. Every Christmas Eve without fail (at least that I can remember). My aunts, uncles, their children, and their children’s children all gather and my Pa’s house to eat and open gifts. The children all received gifts and the adults play dirty Santa. I love it now, but I loved it even more when my Nana was still alive. She had always been the glue that held this family together.

She knew how to keep everyone from fighting.

But I still look forward to Christmas Eve. After having Christmas Eve with my Pa, I would stay the night at my mom’s house. We bake Christmas cookies and drink milk. When I was younger we would leave some out for Santa. Even now I get up excited for Christmas Day. Christmas is my favorite time of year.

Letter to Myself

Kelli,

You are more than enough. I know you are not told that often, but I swear you are. You bring a light to more people’s lives than you let yourself believe you do.

You are not perfect, but that is what makes you so real and interesting. You laugh often. You are honest. You are kind. You are caring. You try to not to judge. You are a motivator.

You have cute freckles and laugh lines around your eyes. You’re passionate about working out. You love your pets and best friends. Family, too.

You are the main character in your own story.

You don’t have everything [or really anything] figured out, and that’s OK.

Every single day you are just trying to be a better person than you were the day before.

Lastly, you are important. You are worthy. You are everything you sometimes think you’re not. You matter. There are people in this world that would miss your presence if you were gone.

Keep surviving until you are living.

I love you.

Love, Kelli

Finding Motivation Again|Mental Health Monday #6

2020 has definitely been a weird and long year. The events of the world has changed our lives forever.

I went into 2020 being confident that this year was going to be MY year. My year actually started out with an unusual amount of panic attacks. Honestly, I understood why I was because I was undergoing a lot of stress with my personal life and the fact that I was graduating in a few months with no idea what I wanted to do with my life.

After I graduated, my mental health went further downhill. The only things I did with my days is go to work, go to the gym, and watch Netflix – not necessarily in that order. You would have thought that going to the gym would have improved my mood, but the gym high did not last. I had been coming home and watching Netflix for hours until I went to bed.

Even though I was struggling for six months of the year,  I finally came out of my slump a week ago. Depression is weird. I can go into a depressive episode for no reason, and I can also suddenly come out of one. I told myself that I needed to be more productive, and I finally did something about it.

I’ve started doing a checklist again. I feel so accomplished when I mark something off of my checklist. This past week I have been trying to get at least half of my checklist done before I turn on Netflix. This will typically put my at starting Netflix sometime after five o’clock. Below is an example of what my typical list consists of.IMG_2455.PNG

I’m hoping this motivation stays for at least a little bit. I’m going a week strong.

Wish me luck.

Consistency is key | My Fitness Journey

I am extremely proud of myself. I have been consistent with working out these past few months. I have been working out at least three days a week – usually more.

What usually happens is I will go to the gym for about a month, but then I lose motivation to keep going. It’s crazy what kind of excuses I could come up with. This would especially happen if I didn’t have someone to go with me to keep me held accountable.

I am proud to say that this is not the case now. These past few months I have been going to the gym regularly. More often than not, I have even been going to the gym alone. I actually love going to the gym by myself now. I feel more focused. (Still love it when you go though, Tawnie).

This time around, I have focused on doing more strength workouts than anything else. I have noticed I have gained some muscle in the past few months.

My routine at the gym is 10-20 minutes of the elliptical to warm up then I do arms, legs, abs, and shoulders. I try to do some of each, although I typically try to focus more on one each day. I do less legs than the other ones because I have knee problems so those have to be done a little at a time. There are also days I sometimes just focus on cardio.

July 15, 2020

Above is a comparison photo from February 3rd to July 15th of this year. I am happy to notice that there is a physical chance in the photos. As you can see my arms and stomach are a little more defined. I have also noticed a difference in my back and butt too.

One thing I have been struggling with is food intake. I know I am not getting enough or the right macros, but I am trying to change that. Starting today I am going to be tracking my macro intake via the app “Mike’s Macros,” which was recommended by bodybyryanfitness on Instagram.

I am going to try to plan my meals more accordingly in order to get enough protein and other things that I need. I am still trying to figure everything out.

I will try to come back with an update in a few weeks. Remember, consistency is key.

Do you have any advice for me on my food intake, or even advice for muscle gain?

 

Weekly Affirmations & Gratitude #6

These weekly affirmations and gratitude have helped me think more positively. Here is my affirmations and gratitude for July 5 through July 11.

Affirmations:

  1. I am kind to others.
  2. I challenge myself to grow.
  3. I will continue to fight my mental illnesses.
  4. I know I am where I am supposed to be, but I also know I am not meant to stay here.
  5.  I am more than my anxiety.
  6. I am working on letting people help me.
  7. I have faith that everything will work out.

Gratitude:

  1. I am grateful for Sunday evenings.
  2. I am grateful for music.
  3. I am grateful for the bad days because they make the good days better.
  4. I am grateful for my cousins that are like sisters.
  5. I am grateful for my work friends that are like family.
  6. I am grateful for downtime after work.
  7. I am grateful for empty gyms.

Weekly Affirmations & Gratitude #5

Hello! This is my affirmations and gratitude for June 28 through July 4.

Affirmations:

  1. I am strong-willed.
  2. I accept change well.
  3. When I love, I love with everything.
  4. I deserve to have my dreams come true.
  5. Money constantly flows toward me.
  6. It’s okay to not know everything.
  7. I will acknowledge my own self-worth.

Gratitude:

  1. I am grateful for my nieces and nephew.
  2. I am grateful to be able to work extra shifts.
  3. I am grateful to have friends that care about my well-being.
  4. I am grateful for exfoliating.
  5. I am grateful for my coworker friends.
  6. I am grateful for a raise at work.
  7. I am grateful for kittens.

 

Weekly Affirmations & Gratitude #1

I used to tend to focus on a lot of negative things. Going to counseling has made me realize just how often I talk negatively.

I decided this past week that I wanted to do a daily affirmation and gratitude. Every day I pick one for each and write them on a piece of paper.

At the end of each week I am going to post them on here.

Affirmations:

  1. I am loved.
  2. I am worthy.
  3. I am enough.
  4. My opinions matter.
  5. I am doing my best.
  6. I handle life’s difficulties well.
  7. I am learning to love myself.

Gratitude:

  1. I am grateful for the roof over my head.
  2. I am grateful for being able to eat whenever I want.
  3. I am grateful for my animals.
  4. I am grateful for my friends.
  5. I am grateful for my family.
  6. I am grateful for my job.
  7. I am grateful for being able to graduate college.

What are some things you are grateful for? And what affirmations are your favorite? When I am meditating, I typically use “I am loved, and I am worthy.”

2020 New Year Resolutions

Hello everyone! I hope you have all had a great year so far! This year I am really putting a challenge on myself to become a better and happier person. I wrote out a whole list of New Year Resolutions that I want to complete this 2020. I actually put them in a notebook and am logging the things I get done. What I mean by this is, for example, I want to workout at least three times a week. To keep myself motivated, I created a ‘workout log’ in a notebook so I will more likely hold myself accountable each week. Here are some more resolutions (and how I keep up with it):

1Self-care to help your mental health – I wrote a list of things I can do that could help my mental health. For example, workout, dance, hot shower, face mask, ect.

2. Be a better friend and family member – I wrote out ways I could do this.

3. Read at least x books in 2020 – When I read a book, I write the title, author and the date I finished reading it.

4. Save money (goal: $5,000) – I write out the date I deposit money, the amount deposited and the total amount saved in 2020.

5. Workout log (goal: 3 times a week) – I have writen ‘week x (month date – month date), and then under it have the day, how long I worked out and what kind of workout.

6. Podcasts (goal: watch 2 a month) – I write the podcast name, the author and the date listened.

7. Trying new things (at least 4 a month) – I write down the new thing I tried, the date I tried it and a note about if I liked it or not.

8. Learn how to cook – I list the things I have cooked and when I cooked it.

9. Youtube ideas – I have a list of ideas for my youtube channel.

10. Blog ideas – I have a list of ideas for my blog.

11. How to be more extroverted.confident – I have a list on things to achieve this.

These are the New Year Resolutions that I have for this year. What are your New Year Resolutions? Do you have any suggestions on what else I can do to have a happy 2020?

Trying the Matcha Frappuccino from Starbucks

You should check out my YouTube video! It’s been so long since I’ve uploaded so I apologize. It’s not because I haven’t filmed anything, but I haven’t had the motivation to edit! Hopefully I’ll do better…

I would appreciate it if you liked, commented and subscribed to my YouTube channel. 🙂

Have a great day!

xx Kelli

Life Update: School, Birthday, Youtube

This is going to be an update on my life from the first two weeks of school. My first two weeks have been a rollercoaster of emotion.

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On August 24, I packed everything up in my car (forgetting some important things like my coffee maker), and I moved back into my dorm room at school. Honestly, I don’t mind living in a dorm. It’s a whole lot quieter than being at home. Although I do miss my animals. Sometimes it gets lonely. I have suite mates (so we share a bathroom), but I do not that a roommate because I paid for a private dorm.

I was really nervous to start school this year because I heard some negative things about a couple of the classes I was taking. Attending the classes have slightly eased my worry about them. I know one will be slightly difficult, but I’ve had this teacher enough to know what he wants on his tests. The other class has a different (better) teacher than previously. He’s actually one of my favorite teachers, and I think he’s going to make this class somewhat enjoyable. I also had concerns about an English class. Previous English classes I have taken have been somewhat boring. The teachers were good, but the material wasn’t interesting to me. I have a short attention span so something has to be interesting to keep me from going “squirrel!” every five seconds. Obviously not literally, but hopefully you understand what I am referring to. 

Then there was Labor Day Weekend – which was super fun because my family and I went to Illinois for a family reunion.

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We do this every year, and I honestly love it because I get to see family I literally only see during Labor Day Weekend. Most of my family went for the whole week, but since I had school responsibilities, I could only go for the weekend.

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We mostly just all caught up with one another, ate really good food and played corn hole. If you don’t know what cornhole is – bless your heart. 

On Sunday, my grandpa drove me back to my dorm (because he also picked me up). I didn’t do anything for the rest of the holiday except play “Detroit Become Human.”

My second week of classes were not too bad, but procrastination has already taken a hold of my life. I did all of my homework the day it was due.

I’m not going to life. My anxiety has been awful. On Wednesday, I almost had a panic attack. Over the weekend, my grandpa was kind enough to bring me my coffee maker since I left it at his house. Well on Wednesday, I was actually motivated to make a new YouTube video of me trying instant coffee for the first time.

Well.

As I was getting my coffee maker out of the box, the coffee pot fell off and shattered on my floor.

Interesting fact about me: glass shattering gives me really bad anxiety.

I don’t know why it does, but it does to the extent I was almost have a full-blown panic attack. If you don’t know what anxiety can feel like (for others it could be different): shaking, numb, can’t breathe, heart racing.

That’s what was happening to me.

Luckily, I was able to calm down somewhat, but I still felt and uneasy feeling for the majority of the day.

I did end up buying a new coffeemaker and the YouTube video should be up within the next few weeks.

That same day, however, I started catching what I thought was a cold. I come to find out it was just really bad sinuses. I could barely function. It was terrible. It took me a week to finally start getting over it.

Finally, September 9 was my birthday. I am officially 22 years old. It honestly does not feel like I am 22. I mean, I looked like I’m 16 and sometimes I act like it too.

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Those are how my last two weeks have been like. I’ve left stuff out like how I’ve been obsessed with Tik Tok here lately – probably because I literally have no close friends at school. (You can add me on there @ kelliyoung42). Also, I’ve taken a break from working out, but I hope to start back now that I feel better than I did.

I hope you have a great day! More posts should be coming soon!

“I love you.”

“I love you” is something that is said automatically where I live. After ending a phone call or leaving to go somewhere, “I love you” is always said to a loved one. “Ok, I have to go. Bye, I love you.” *hangs up*

The problem with this is that I am not one to tell how I feel verbally. I feel awkward telling the people I love “I love you.” As soon as someone tells me, I get an anxious feeling in me, and I try to leave or hang up as soon as possible.

But that does not mean that I do not love them.

I show love differently.

I show love in the way I am there when they call me last minute asking for a favor. I show love in the way I smile at them. I show love in the way I put down my phone so I can listen to what they have to say.

I usually show love in actions instead of words.

It does not mean that I do not love someone any less just because it’s hard for me to sometimes tell them how I feel.

I believe as long as someone shows that they love someone – the words shouldn’t matter.

“Actions speak louder than words.”

Mark Twain

I’m Back!

Hello everyone! I’m back! It has been a very long time since I have written a blog, and I have missed it so much! There has been quite a bit going on in my life, and I hope I can share it all on here at some point. College and work has been taking up the most of my time, but I hope I can finally start posting content regularly.

I am not sure what you should expect from my blog yet. I have always been unsure as to what I should blog about. It’s probably going to be a little bit of everything from my life. Everything from my YouTube Channel to some favorite recipes to my travels. There will be a wide variety of topics.

One more thing that I thought I should is to tell you a little about myself. My name is Kelli Young. I am a Communications major and English minor. I am going into my last year of college starting fall of 2019. I have four cats and one dog. I love volunteering at a local animal shelter. Coffee helps me feel more like a person and less like a zombie when I first wake up. I guess you could say I am a Harry Potter geek. I have so much Harry Potter merch that it would be easier to ask what I do not have.

One last thing, I have had a love for writing for as long as I can remember. When I was little, I used to write little short stories and sell them for a quarter to some of my family members. I have thought about getting a job after college that has to deal with writing, but I do not feel like I would enjoy writing for other people. I like being about to write what ever I want to write about.

That being said, I hope you have a great day.

5 Ways to Win My Heart

I have taken a 30 day writing journal challenge and there’s some of them that I would like to post on here. This is day 1 of 30. The picture below is of the rest of the days in case you want to participate.


1. Pay Attention

  • Honestly just pay attention to the things I say. I love when people remember some of the little things I say. I think it shows how the person cares.

2. Make me laugh

  • The way to my heart is being able to make me laugh. If a guy can’t make me laugh then it’s a no go because I seriously laugh all the time.

3. Encourage me

  • I need someone to motivate me to be the best I can be. Someone that would be willing to push me to be a better person.

4. Thoughtful gestures

  • I don’t need expensive things. If you got me my favorite coffee without me asking, it would probably melt my heart.

5. Be willing to take it slow

  • I know a lot of people want a relationship to go fast nowadays but I’m not one of those people. I’ve never been one to go fast in a relationship. If a guy tries to speed things up then I’m more likely to walk away. I wish I was born back when dating was way different.